Thanks to Izzudin because of him I've got an idea to make this post. After the sad chat that I've been through a few hours ago, and all the tears that cannot be wiped even with a box of tissues, I tried to get up and be okay *cewah ayat*
Well, do you ever feel, when a person is far away,and you anxiously count down the days until you'll see them again, marking every single date in a calendar, because you know it doesn't really matter you're separated for, you'll be able to meet them soon. Then, when a person is gone for good, and the only thing you can rely on is the pictures and memories you once shared, and despite those being able to make you smile or laugh, all you really want is that person to come back.
Dear you, I'm just so sad because I really like you; more than I like anyone in a long time. Tonight I got slapped in the face with the reality of you're life that I'll never know. But the saddest thing is you're not willing to share any of your problem to me. It make me feels like, who I am to you? You have no clue how much I cared. How much I do anything to make you smile. How much it took in me just to say goodnight sometimes. How hard i forced myself to believe you'll be okay everyday. I'm not desperate for a relationship, but I do miss the feeling of having that can make me smile and appreciated.
I'm sorry for being over-thinking in everything. I'm sorry because I can't hardly understand your situation. All I was thinking is you will always be there, everytime I text you, or even call you. When you're not replying one of it, my mind start to think that you probably hate me now. The thought of you working for a good thing never crossed my mind at all. I know you're too busy with your work. So I decided to keep myself busy with things to do, but everytime I paused, I never stopped thinking of you. I'm sorry. I know I need to stop being so damn emotional about everything. I need to stop this.
I love you.
I love you.