My dearest, you brought tears to my eyes… i am so thankful that i have you in my life, and the fact that my friends are very few does not upset me AT ALL, for i have you, and having YOU makes me content and pleased… i am very honored to be the well of your secrets, this means the world to me.. and i want you to know that your secrets are NEVER a burden on me.
Our friendship is a miracle itself.. a bless.. a strength that enables us to go on along this bumpy road knowing things will be just fine, becuz at the end of the day, we know we each have someone who cares about us no matter what happens… or what wrong we may do.
It is such a wonder how when it comes to us, we treat each other differently, I have never managed to treat other friends the way I treat you! I have never managed to accept their faults, nor bare with some qualities of theirs which contradict to my own.. we should not be harsh on people nor judgmental, but I am ashamed to say I have not achieved this with some people, and proud to know I can never judge you, nor feel agitated about anything you do or say.. isn’t it a wonder? Alhamdulillah, knowing there is someone in this world I feel this way about lets me realize I have been given a gift millions have never dreamed of obtaining.
I am thankful, for your friendship, for your sisterhood, for the bond that back at some point in our life was about to break, but thanks to you, to your insistence, your patience, Allah not only mended this relationship, but made it one of the rarest in this world… every time I look back at those days, I remember how bad I felt, how lonely, how tears were not only warm and bitter, but brutally stabbing my foolish heart… I Thank Allah, that these days have passed by bringing along brighter memories.. i am glad i did not leave the chance i had to go waste… for i would have ended up suffering my entire life.
Many people, when they love someone truly, they keep on telling them how they will do anything in the world for their sake, it may sound to some as a scene in a movie or a chapter in a novel, it did seem so for me at some stage, but those who witness true love, understand well that these are not only some mere words that are being said and then forgotten.. it is a promise that we make without a slight thought, a swear we practice not in front of a court judge, but in front of Allah the judge of all, not because we have to, but because it pleasures our souls to do so for those who matter the most to us.
Sometimes I joke around with my family, telling them that when I die, they are not allowed to enjoy my belongings! lol instead, my books for example will go to my soul-mate, even if she has the same books! for I am sure, the ones she haven’t read yet, she would read them from the ones that used to belong to me but then again, we will not need to inherit each other Inshallah cuz, I strongly believe that Allah will grant us the wish we want more than anything in this world, the prayer I never forget to say, the need I always plead for when I pray to Allah , the relief that I strongly desire no matter how greedy it may sound. you know dear soul-mate that I cannot go on without you, nor leave without you.
These days, saying DON’T GO seems to be stuck in my throat, i keep on reminding myself that I cannot be selfish! I shouldn’t be! Saying it would immediately make me choke with tears.
But, Don’t go, and break this fragile heart. but break it, only if it would help mend yours, and i mean it from the deepest point in my heart